Big Hands, Small Hands

I used to have a children's book that was a compilation of fantasy and possibly science fiction stories. It had a blue cover, and my name was written on the endpaper because I loaned it to my friend Jen in middle school. I don't remember the name (this will become a theme). I don't remember most of the stories, though it did have a portion of The Silver Chair which was my first introduction to not liking C. S. Lewis.

But one story I remember because it disturbed me. It was about fat little hippopotamus-like creatures that lived underground in burrows like hedgehogs. They drank tea, too, so it was obviously by a British author. I forget the name of their species (see, a theme), but it was cutesy and full of consonants, like Snuffaleupagus only not Snuffaleupagus because that's the character on Sesame Street and he's adorable. Anyway, they were plump and white and you knew this because the short story had several illustrations.

The plot of the story was that this one fat hippopotamus-creature's home was invaded by a thin, black, spider-like creature and I am at this very moment wondering if there were racial themes that went completely over my twelve-year-old head. Anyway, the freaky, spindly creature scared the bejeebers out of the fat thing and after some cloying adventures they became friends.

In any case, I don't know why but the story, or rather the pictures, stuck with me. The bloated white animal contrasting with the spindly black creature. Sometimes the pictures would float into my mind when I was in bed, and they would keep me from going to sleep. It had something to do with the contrast between the fat and the thin gave me a feeling of too much size that confused my brain.

Anyway, all of this is prelude to a weird thing that happened to me today. I was in a meeting with my boss's boss before she goes to China for a few weeks, and all of a sudden the white and black creatures popped into my mind and my hands felt gigantic! I felt as if my hands were suddenly twice their normal size and weight. They felt heavy in my lap, as if my shoulders were being pulled down.

I tried moving them to different positions, but each time they were stationary the sensation came back. My mind kept replaying the comparison that my hands were the explodingly fat white hippo-creatures.

By the end of the meeting the feeling had abated. The meeting went well so I don't think it was a stress response. But it was very strange! I hope I masked it well, though I suspect I was a little less communicative than normal since there was a running dialogue in my head "What the heck--Maybe if I move like this it will--Stupid white guys--my hands aren't like the fat white things--etc".

The front of the book had a dragon on it. Still don't remember the name.