Schools of Thought

According to Mythbusters, there are two schools of thought when it comes to dog training. One is to reward good behavior and punish bad behavior. The other is to reward good behavior and simply ignore bad behavior.

I would like to be treated in the second way.

That's something I have come to realize about myself. I like praise. If I'm told I did something well I'll continue to try to do it the same way, or improve. I don't like criticism. I accept that criticism is necessary, but I don't like it. Because I normally always know if I did something wrong so I'm not going to not try and avoid doing it again. I will work harder and more consistently to earn praise than to avoid censure.

But if there's no reward at all for good behavior, only punishment for bad behavior...Why try?

It would be like getting these comments after you threw a dinner party:

"The chicken was delicious. You have a knack with chicken."

"The chicken was so delicious it made up for the green beans tasting like feet."

"The green beans tasted like feet."

The first guest you share your recipe with and invite again. The second guest you'll hesitate before inviting again. And the third guest you show the door. You'll try a different green bean recipe the next time the first guest comes over, maybe go to the effort of testing different recipes beforehand, because you want to make food she'll enjoy. You'll make a different vegetable altogether when (and if) the second guest comes again because you don't want to be told it tastes like feet. And you'll avoid the third guest entirely because you don't like being insulted.

The annoying this is that even though I recognize this about myself now I haven't found a way to better deal with second and third guests.